I have Nancy Pelosi Hair!

OMG! I realized one fine day while perusing the Fox News pages on-line, I HAVE NANCY PELOSI HAIR! I’ve not been totally happy with the short bob thing I’ve been wearing this summer. You ever have those hair days? those hair months? those hair years? Fortunately, I’m not hating this hair for years, yet. It’s just that I have hair woes... I want something different.

Most of my friends reading this are primed with a “shut up, Shirin” kinda comment lurking in their brains. I know girlfriends, I DO have great hair. I got monkey feet and my dad’s hands, but I am aware I have inherited an amazing coiffure of thick hair. I’ve also prematurely gone gray so my amazing coiffure of thick hair costs a fortune to color, but I digress.

Nancy Pelosi hair, however, THAT I didn’t count on. I mean c’mon... can you see me bringing in a magazine clipping with that all too familiar question, “Will my hair do that if you cut it right?” NO! I never said that. So, how did I end up with Nancy Pelosi hair?

My hair has a mind of it’s own. Those stylists can cut it and blow it dry, sell me various product, recommend the proper brush, but my hair will always end up doing what it wants. I also had Nancy Pelosi hair in the 80’s. If you don’t believe me, peruse my facebook photos.

The other day, I went into the salon saying, “I’m ready to grow it out now,” but since my stylists ALSO has a mind of her own, I walked out with Mrs. Incredible Hair! Which would be awesome if I were a superhero, but I’m not. I wish I were a super-stylist and could actually make it look like it did when I walked out of the salon. Needless to say, she didn’t make it look like Mrs. Incredible Hair. After she did it, it just looked rather incredible. With me and my hair brushes and plethora of prodcuts, however, it’s just not going to happen.

Instead, my hair reminds me of the Dorothy Hamill “do” I wore in 5th grade. Like I said, it’s gonna do what it wants to do. I am giving up believing I have control over my hair or my stylists... even though I pay them. I am relinquishing the need to make my hair into something it’s not. It is what it is. Perhaps the better question is, why am I trying so hard to change what is perfectly good all by itself?

Because when I close my eyes at night I imagine looking like Eva Longoria. If I could also change into a 5 foot nothing size 0 that would be awesome, too. I guess it is human nature to want what we don’t have, even when we have it all.