Saturday, July 26, 2008

Oh, Big Brother!

Did you hear the latest?

Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has made it official: California will be the first trans-fat free state in the nation. For more on this latest news go to the original article at ABC news.

My first thought was: Oh goody! Maybe he'll give us a tax right-off for going to the gym? or being vegetarian? or being the recommended weight? Could we get bonus points for being TV free? Hey! People get tax breaks for driving a hybrid! What about an allowance for those of us who refuse to be couch potatoes? How about it Big Brother?

Do you think they could make a law against Tostitos, Lays, and Pringles?

Maybe they’ll outlaw donut shops?

Can you imagine margarine being illegal? ... Joe and I could start a bootlegging business selling:
- Crisco
- Non-dairy creamers
- Ritz crackers
- Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal
- Nabisco Chips Ahoy!
- Cool Whip
- Hidden Valley Ranch Salad Dressing

We’d be rich!

Did you know that Ramen noodles are loaded with trans fats? I see it now .... teenage boys in swim trunks and tank tops sneaking to my door Friday nights to buy a stash of noodles in styrofoam cups for the Saturday morning swim meet. I would be the local soup dealer corrupting the athletes in my community. Before you know it, they’d be doing trans fat testing to see if the boys were tainted before their races. Aaaahhhh!

Oh, Brother! Now I’m having visions of Michael Phelps being carried away in handcuffs and it’s all my fault. I can’t stomach the thought. Will the Pantry Police come and get me? I really think I need to snack on a bag of Ranch Flavored Doritos. Until Big Brother makes more laws, they are only 3 bucks a bag.

Monday, July 14, 2008

Blissfulness of Bins, Boxes and Baskets

When I get to Heaven there will be organized bins and boxes. Did you know that? I have no idea what we have to store up for ourselves in Heaven, but at least we won’t have to worry about moths and rust destroying anything. I know there will be organization in Heaven because orderliness is next to cleanliness and cleanliness, of course, is next to Godliness!

Last year, when I moved into my new house, my friend mentioned how many wicker baskets I had. Little did she know the history of some of those earthy, friendly warm containers that lovingly cradled crackers and dryer sheets and napkins and hand lotions and clean towels. Those precious baskets would have stories to tell. Yes, I was an organizer before organizing was “in”. In all honesty, I have never been in a Stacks N Stacks or a Container Store, but I know I would feel at home there. I do love to organize. I love organizing the way I used to love shopping.

Are you having a flashback? In college, the coolest way to spend my time was to go to the mall with my friend Delia (who has the same taste and who is the same size) and 100 bucks in my wallet. We’d have fun seeing how far our 100 bucks would go. Today, however, I seek the perfect Rubbermaid, Sterlite or “pretty box” with which to put my stuff. Today I like shopping for the stuff to put my stuff in. Am I American or what?

I also learned on my recent trek up half dome that I am a Baggie Person. What a thrill to realize there’s a label for a person like me! You might think that it sounds like a “Bag Lady”, but I assure you, the compliment far extends the benefit of being a bag lady. I actually know a bag-type lady who prefers the art of dumpster diving but that is a blog for another day. No, I am a Baggie Lady. Emphasis on the “ee”. What I didn’t know I was missing out on is the new gigantic industrial strength baggie!.... with a ziploc top! Perfect for those enormous loaves of sourdough bread you don’t want to go stale. You know some mom out there invented the ziploc top. It’s sheer brilliance. Think about it ladies, how many times did having a ziploc top save you a gigantic mess in the indispensible diaper bag? Ziplocs are a godsend. Baggies will definitely be in Heaven and I will feel at home there.

Certainly, I like to organize and care for my “stuff”. In my backpack the day I hiked Half Dome I had strategically placed all valuables and not so valuables in baggies. Some genius will discover the art of color coding them that way. Some day when I’m searching through my backpack for my ipod or my camera or my nilla wafers, I can search for the COLOR I put them in. Hear that Glad? Hear that Ziploc? COLOR CODED baggies! Is anyone listening?

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Well Pleased

They did it. Mom had to admit that she couldn’t do it. No. It was a job for Dad. Taking his son to the highest heights on the slipperiest slopes and making a mountain out of a man. Okay. So he’s not a man yet, but he did something today he will add to resume of great accomplishments... and he did it with his dad.

Evan hiked Half Dome.

This blog belongs on my Schneider’s Climbing Mountains “Brag” Blog but since no one has commented on my super cool and very first slideshow, (I think I made a technical glitch making it impossible to view) I am leaving my own accomplishments there and bragging about Evan here. Enjoy my second slideshow below (which is better than my first) and thank God along with me for a marvelous, wonderful and terrific 13 year old son who is growing up to be a fine young man.

I am very proud of my son. I am a Mom who is Well Pleased.